‘what do you need?’, I ask
‘a miracle’, you answer
your eyes drop
you look away
ashamed of feeling powerless
and so you never notice the sparkles and glow in the air around me
as you utter
the word
miracle
truth seeds and poetry
love letters
‘what do you need?’, I ask
‘a miracle’, you answer
your eyes drop
you look away
ashamed of feeling powerless
and so you never notice the sparkles and glow in the air around me
as you utter
the word
miracle
in the space
between you
and you
your absence is heavy
weighting me down
as I hang in there
in my river
you now are
flowing calmly towards endlessness
streams effortlessly converged
unexpectedly, past a meander
our waters forever intertwined
amongst green hills of gratitude
under clear skies of love
the second the world fell apart
we became the opposite sides
of the same, damaged coin
the second the world fell apart
we broke into old pieces
we broke into old patterns:
me, sacrificing truth
you, sacrificing trust
I lost you
as you free-fell into your pain
a place where only you exist
I lost me
as I free-fell into your pain
desperate to find you there, to not be left alone
and so you lost me, too
love potions, too
taste bitter
shadows of white lies, too
are dark
I thought my heart would break…
my heart didn’t break
it healed
as I surrendered fully to loosing you
as I accepted my heart wasn’t choosing you
if it meant giving up on our dreams
and that’s what you asked, so it seems
have we ever really lived
until we’ve loved us through a naked goodbye
seeing only beauty through the tears
have we ever really loved
until we’ve lived the moment of complete surrender to impermanence
loved – not because of a dream nor a history, but the everlasting now
loved – bravely, with death sitting beside us
dear lover,
move me with your clear direction, hold me in my passion
touch me with each breath you’re taking, melt away my walls
expose what is beneath it all
a glowing force
a dancing flame
a naked woman with no name
dear lover, with your solid presence warm my thin bare shoulders
Christmas came early – I wasn’t ready!
My fridge was all empty, my house was not cleaned
Nothing was wrapped with beautiful ribbons
Nothing prepared to be opened and seen
I cry my tears and you hold me tight
whispering
I’m here, you’re safe
asking no questions
needing no answers
knowing my tears are just ice that is melting
glaciers surrendering in the warm spring of safe love
unconsciously
undeliberately
we sacrificed
as we humans do, when we leave parts of us behind
forget them in places, forget them in people
in relationships
in love
and as I was lying there
dizzy from the high fall
achy from the painful impact of reality
I finally learned
that I cannot avoid being dropped